Monday, February 11, 2008

Here's One That's Too Weird Even For Me ...

So, fellow flacks and other interested parties ... did you hear about this one?

It appears there are these two guys in California (Where else?). The one guy is a Sunsoaker who has all these solar panels atop his humble abode. The other guy is a Treehugger who has these 40 foot redwoods in his backyard.

Well, the trees, doing what Redwood trees do through no fault of their own, grow. Problem is, they grow up so high that they block the sun from the first guy's solar array. So, Guy No. 1, the Sunsoaker, sues Guy No. 2, the Treehugger (really, in a Court of Law, where else?) to force him to cut down the trees so the sun can shine on his solar panels. I kid you not.

Guy No. 2 (being the global warming eco-warrior that he is) says, "My federally-protected Redwood trees are just as eco-friendly as your taxpayer-subsidized solar panels" and doesn't want to cut them down. He actually says that the trees must have legal standing! I'm not making this up ... (trust me, I couldn't make this stuff up.)

So they end up in the above-mentioned Court of Law (Where else but in California? ROTFLMAO!) and the Judge, in a classic Shakepearean way, actually rules in favor of the Sunsoaker, citing a 1970's California law that apparently says tress that block the sun between 10 am and 2 pm are illegal. Yep, it's true. Trees are negligent entities under California law. And to top it off, the Judge imposes a $1000.00/day fine on the Treehugger if he doesn't cut them down. (I'll bet these guys are the life of the neighborhood Earth Day Block Party next year.)

So much for the concept of the old growth forest, I guess. Does this mean that the logging industry just needs to put up some solar panels and the Spotted Owl becomes and accomplice after the fact?

And people wonder why these granola munching enivro-nuts are the topic of cocktail party jokes.

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